Random Jokes

Dictionary for women

1. Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.
2. Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them.
3. Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.
4. Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician."
5. Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."
6. Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
7. Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.